As ultimately derivative and deprecating as we are of Free Darko at our core, we (okay; it's just me) at Pearls of Mystery are aware of the cosmic irony of this pronouncement. Being about ten years Shoals' younger, we're not oblivious to the fact that Pearls of Mystery is ultimately destined for a still more farcical conclusion than anything we've published yet, or any interaction yet, be it with Shoals or RJ or Burl Ives or even with the gnawing belief that "maybe it's wrong the things I wrote there." Who knows how it will happen? How will Pearls of Mystery die? Well, no one knows. Who by water and who by fire? Who by sword? Who by beast?
Who by simultaneously vindicating and deconstructing happenings in the world of basketball? Enter Richard Jefferson and his amazing series against the Spurs, his former comrades. Frig. In 2:44 of Game 1 against the Spurs, Warrior Richard Jefferson put up a -14, and his only contribution statistically was to miss two free throws. In this void of meaningful basketball activity, the Spurs struck with an inspiring comeback, ultimately helping the Spurs to finish the Warriors off after a strong series. Granted, the entire series was not his fault, but the one time Jefferson did visibly play defense, he botched it so badly I had to laugh. In transition against Tony Parker, he either committed to the lane (but didn't actually help) or committed to the corner (but didn't actually cover the corner), giving the Spurs either an easy layup or an easy corner three. Even the Warriors that could have stopped one of the options were hurt by Jefferson's defense, as they assumed he'd be covering something. It was amazing, guys.
May 5, 2013
Spurs vs. Warriors Part I
Ah, what is there to write about in the NBA? Nothing, it seems. At present there are four series presenting themselves. First found Kevin Durant having to go it alone against the Memphis Grizzlies, in the wake of Russell Westbrook's injury! Second, we have the Knicks and Pacers deciding whether they would grind it out or would shoot the ball; in other words, who would win the series. Third, we have the Heat looking to sweep the Bulls without Rose, and the Bulls - on whom Nate Robinson is literally the best offensive player - were looking to... not get swept? And finally we have the Spurs in the second round of the playoffs. Ho hum. But what is this? They would be facing Richard Jefferson-led Golden State Warriors? This I have to cover.
Alright, let's back up. Just like RJ, not a starter. He is a back-up. I lied about that leadership thing. At 32 or 33, Richard Jefferson is by leaps and bounds the oldest and most experienced player of the young Warriors, and simultaneously their best and worst role model imaginable. He is definitely not their leader. Richard Jefferson is by leaps and bounds not the Warriors' leader.
But, carrying himself with class and dignity, the not-so-young Jefferson conducts every interview trying to root out all things he cannot possibly be held accountable for, and then apologizes for each of them in turn. "Do you feel they were giving the other team cheap fouls?" he'd be asked, and without hesitation would respond, "You know who gets cheap fouls? Savvy vets. I don't care if I wasn't on the floor, you know, I failed to teach these younger guys how to draw and avoid cheap fouls. It's on me." Savvy of him to note - he takes a burden of fault off the young players and places upon himself, while still putting that burden on them in the future. Savvy of him to note also because it reinforces that he has some reason to exist. And, really, he does. He genuinely tries his best to teach the young players, not just about being savvy but about the subtle margins and compensations every player must make in order to succeed. Jefferson notes with a laugh that he has one of the biggest hitches in his shot in the league, and one of the worst handles. He openly admits it because he doesn't expect to join another team. Even the Spurs he kept this information from, but now, he laughs about it. His punchline: "I never got into a conversation that would end in HORSE or a one-on-one. I avoided those conversations with wily cleverness. I got into a lot of dunk contests, though, haha."
Alright, let's back up. Just like RJ, not a starter. He is a back-up. I lied about that leadership thing. At 32 or 33, Richard Jefferson is by leaps and bounds the oldest and most experienced player of the young Warriors, and simultaneously their best and worst role model imaginable. He is definitely not their leader. Richard Jefferson is by leaps and bounds not the Warriors' leader.
But, carrying himself with class and dignity, the not-so-young Jefferson conducts every interview trying to root out all things he cannot possibly be held accountable for, and then apologizes for each of them in turn. "Do you feel they were giving the other team cheap fouls?" he'd be asked, and without hesitation would respond, "You know who gets cheap fouls? Savvy vets. I don't care if I wasn't on the floor, you know, I failed to teach these younger guys how to draw and avoid cheap fouls. It's on me." Savvy of him to note - he takes a burden of fault off the young players and places upon himself, while still putting that burden on them in the future. Savvy of him to note also because it reinforces that he has some reason to exist. And, really, he does. He genuinely tries his best to teach the young players, not just about being savvy but about the subtle margins and compensations every player must make in order to succeed. Jefferson notes with a laugh that he has one of the biggest hitches in his shot in the league, and one of the worst handles. He openly admits it because he doesn't expect to join another team. Even the Spurs he kept this information from, but now, he laughs about it. His punchline: "I never got into a conversation that would end in HORSE or a one-on-one. I avoided those conversations with wily cleverness. I got into a lot of dunk contests, though, haha."
Interlude: Pearls of Mystery Tackles the Big Questions
So I get to this site, and it asks me to take a survey to see the page. I just wanted to, you know, see the cap space on all the teams in the league, you know? I'm (theoretically) making the NBA world a little more comprehensible. I'd been asked a direct question, and I wanted to answer. And so I get to this site. And this site has the audacity to ask me a fairly personal question, you know, or share the page with all my little friends on Facebook or Twitter, so now everyone knows I'm reading this page (I haven't read it yet!) or some anonymous marketer somewhere gets to look at his quarterly numbers and say "Thank God for Alex Dewey; we can go to Aruba now." I don't even know where Aruba is, and, frankly, you know, I don't think I'd want to. I thought about it and closed the web site without getting that information. Other places would have it.
But like, here's the thing... like, I was curious, because, like, I've seen this a few places, newspapers and all that, and it pissed me off every time, right? So I started researching it. I was curious, you know, what's the protocol for society when someone invents something that immediately annoys us? What's the proverbial ventilation for our social irritants?
But like, here's the thing... like, I was curious, because, like, I've seen this a few places, newspapers and all that, and it pissed me off every time, right? So I started researching it. I was curious, you know, what's the protocol for society when someone invents something that immediately annoys us? What's the proverbial ventilation for our social irritants?
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